[Note: There are 3 types of grading; Below Expectations (read: You are not doing so good); Meets Expectations (read: Your work is acceptable) and Exceeds Expectations (read: Well done!)]

Just to give the background story before I continue, I have been without a manager since March 15. My team of 3 (including myself) have been on "auto-pilot" mode for about 7 months until my local manager joined end October. During these 7 months, I expanded my workscope from the low-end photocopy and scanning to performing actual documentation input. Unfortunately, since I had started off doing the low-end stuff, I still had to do the low-end tasks together now with the higher level processing. This translated into longer hours since I had more responsibilities. I do not grudge this since I had requested for the expanded scope and viewed it as career development.

The only thing that I was not too happy about is that nobody does the scanning in my absence. Nobody. Everyone thinks I am the default "scanner". So when I went on my mandatory 5 day leave, I had a ton of scanning to complete when I returned. Since there was a scanning turnaround of 5 days upon receipt (which everyone knows), that was obviously breached. My team members only did the document input into the systems and conveniently left the scanning to me when I returned. That was not very nice I thought. It was a mad rush for me to complete scanning the documents when I returned from leave . One colleague even commented, "You must be very busy scanning the documents after you return from leave!"

I nearly fainted when I heard that. They can make such comments and yet not cross their minds that THEY can scan too in my absence? [In fact, they can. The scanner sits with a free computer terminal which anyone can access.]

So that triggered me to look for other opportunities. I was getting pissed and felt it was not really fair they picked parts of the processing cycle to cover in my absence and conveniently ignored the unglamourous parts.

Therefore, I looked. Looked out of the bank. Looked within the bank. It just so happened that the bigger department I sit within (Global Credit Risk Management) was hubbing the Overlimits Monitoring team into Singapore. So I applied. I would still be reporting to my same local manager and sit within the same bigger department. The only change would be in my job function within GCRM and I would fall out of my Global Manager's reporting line (because I report to him functionally). [Like how my Global Manager joked; I was still within the family and just going to work for the step-sister]

I got the job. The interview was the easiest I have ever been. The Head of GCRM simply explained the job functions and immediately offered me the position. Apparently, he had a good impression of me and commented during the interview that I was energetic. I have no idea why energetic is a compliment. My colleague thinks it's the Japanese way of expressing enthusiasm. Apparently, enthusiasm counts for alot in the corporate world. [Note: If that is truly the case, I am in for a good time. I think most of my friends have commented I am very enthusiastic about stuff I do!]

I know I should be estatic. Some part of me is. Excited that I would start a new job function (no more scanning and packing archival boxes!). Excited that I would be part of a pioneer team. Excited that this new position would expose me to more people in the Credit space. Excited that I think this is a good career move upwards.

On the other hand, I feel like I have let down my Global Manager. He was very encouraging during my review and asked that I stay on to develop myself. He felt that I am a very bright person who is dependable, responsible and always on top of my work.

I feel like I betrayed him. I know this borders on being silly because I have to take charge of my career. I cannot possibly be staying in a department just because I feel indebted or obligated. But it is just how I feel. I always feel very indebted to people who think highly or have great expectations of me. Maybe it is just me who feels overly grateful for appreciation.

I think we will still remain friends even after moving job functions. He met up with my ex-manager for lunch and dinner this trip even though she has resigned from the bank. That was a good sign.

I think a trip to the temple will ease my guilt. I need to pray for good luck in my new position too.